so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
