it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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