so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize