You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
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