Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize