As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
