Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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