I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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