your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
