just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
