Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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