just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
