Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
