i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
