she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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