I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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