Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Randomize
