They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...