butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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