A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
