Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
