Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize