my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
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