Quick, to the slutcave!
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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