Your tits are I can't wait for
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
