Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize