Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
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