I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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