I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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