he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
This house was built for laser tag.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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