You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
It was confusing and full of hummus
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
