As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
