That's intense
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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