Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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