OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
So gin and wine won't be happening again
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
