What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize