i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
