You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
So apparently I’m into choking now
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