I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize