If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
