Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
