So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
