Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My penis needs a shock collar
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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