Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
