The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
What changed your mind?
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....