a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I want to fling myself into the sun
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
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