Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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