try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
