Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
This is not my ceiling
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize