walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize