Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize