Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
