I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
