...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
